| Achievement | How to unlock
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- A wholesome parenting simulator
| - Get an A+ on the Final Level.
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| - Stayed on the loading screen for five minutes.
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| - Make fifty produce splatters.
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| - Get an A+ on the Beach Level.
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| - Talk to all guest at the party in under twenty seconds.
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- Credit where credit's due
| - Watched the end Credits. Thanks for playing!
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| - Get an A+ on the Store Level.
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| - Finish the story with two or more players.
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| - Create a custom character.
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| - Get an A+ on the Airport Level.
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| - Get an A+ on the Bonfire Level.
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| - Get an A+ on the Camp Safety Level.
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| - Win a level without picking up a child.
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- Is it a bird? Is it a plane?
| - Throw the same child 10x in a row.
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| - Wear the Chocolate Cake Hat.
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| - Get an A+ on the Park Level.
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| - Get an A+ on the Zoo Level.
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| - Touch poo while wearing a poo hat.
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| - Lose the game in less then twenty seconds.
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| - Get an A+ on the Party Level.
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| - Top Tier Family. Get an A+ in every level together.
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| - Top Tier Parenting. Get an A+ in every level.
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| - Get an A+ on the Skydiving Level.
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| - Get an A+ on the Ocean Level.
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| - Wear a mix of Angel and Devil Clothing.
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| - Get an A+ on the Outback Level.
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