| Achievement | How to unlock
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| - Defeat robot boss in stage 6.
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- AI Destroyer Mark II (22 points)
| - Complete Stage 11-2/defeat Gibletor again.
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- Alien Anihilator (22 points)
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| - Collect 25 extra attack powerups.
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- Barista Brawler (22 points)
| - Complete game with Ashley.
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| - Complete game on Metal difficulty.
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- Caffeine Addict (22 points)
| - Earn enough energy points in minigame to earn a 1up.
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- Coffee Chugger (22 points)
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- Coffee forgin' (22 points)
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- Cog in the Machine (22 points)
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- Country Punchkin (22 points)
| - Complete stage 5/defeat Skinny Chestknee.
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- Effing Overlord (22 points)
| - Complete stage 10/defeat Overlord.
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- Enemy Abductor (22 points)
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| - Activate a level password.
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- Galactic Savior (32 points)
| - Complete Stage 14-2/defeat Harvester.
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- Groupie Playa (22 points)
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- Guitar Shredding (22 points)
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| - Complete Stage 13-2/defeat Metal Head boss.
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- I am Alien Chow (22 points)
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- I'm Invincible! (22 points)
| - Collect 25 invincibility powerups.
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- I'm the Boss Now (22 points)
| - Beat a boss with max health.
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- Industrial Sabotage (22 points)
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- Jared the Mayonaise (22 points)
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| - Make Metal Head Boss spawn 5 sets of enemies/play complete song within a single fight.
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- Making the Dream Work (22 points)
| - Complete game in co-op mode.
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- Martian Maniacs (22 points)
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| - Complete Death Metal difficulty under 1 hour 15 minutes.
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| - Use a Grey Alien Arm weapon.
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- Repent, Sinner! (22 points)
| - Complete Stage 8-2/defeat Alpha Omega Sin.
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- Riverside Savage (22 points)
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- Rocking the Metal Jesus (22 points)
| - Complete Stage 4-2/defeat Metal Jesus Rocks.
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- Search Your Feelings (22 points)
| - Complete stage 9/defeat Darth B.
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- Smell of Cheaters in the Morning, The (22 points)
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| - Complete Death Metal difficulty under 1 hour 30 minutes.
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- Straight Outta the Street Act 2 (22 points)
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- Straight Outta' the Park (22 points)
| - Defeat bouncers in stage 3.
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- Straight Outta' the Street (22 points)
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- Trippin' It up (22 points)
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| - Complete game on Death Metal difficulty.
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- You Can Probe me Any Time (22 points)
| - Defeat Big Blue Alien miniboss.
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- You've Done this Before (22 points)
| - Earn an extra life from high score.
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