| Achievement | How to unlock
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| - Complete all story missions in Sunnywood.
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- Apocalypse Right Now ( 90 points )
| - Complete all Missions, Odd Jobs, Challenges, and unlock all Landing Zones.
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- Arc de Umph ( 10 points )
| - Belleville - Throw a human above the Arc.
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- Barge Boomer ( 10 points )
| - Belleville - Destroy the barges.
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- Belleville Beneficiary ( 20 points )
| - Find all the Furon Nails in Belleville.
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- Big Fromage ( 30 points )
| - Complete all story missions in Belleville.
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| - Collect 1000000 Furon DNA.
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- Brain Surgeon ( 30 points )
| - Collect 5000000 Furon DNA.
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| - Beat the Furon Librarian's high score in all of the Humania Games.
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- Crypto Sutra ( 90 points )
| - Complete all Paths of Enlightenment.
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- DAHM Master ( 25 points )
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- Definitely Not in Kansas ( 10 points )
| - Shen Long - Unleash the Tornadotron to throw tons of shipyard crates in the air.
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- Destroy All Humans! ( 20 points )
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- Donut Holed ( 10 points )
| - Sunnywood - Throw a civilian through the donut hole.
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- Fist Master ( 20 points )
| - Use the Temporal Fist 75 times.
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- Fist of Furon ( 20 points )
| - Destroy 15 Triads in Shen Long.
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| - Take down 100 airborne enemies with the Seeker Drones.
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- Furoball Dribbler ( 20 points )
| - Bounce 100 humans with the Superballer.
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- Furon Commander ( 35 points )
| - Complete all story missions on the 4th Ring of Furon.
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- Furon Factfinder ( 20 points )
| - Find all the Lava Lamps on the 4th Ring of Furon.
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- Furon in the Sky ( 20 points )
| - Liquify 100 buildings with the Death Ray.
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- Globeclotter ( 10 points )
| - Sunnywood - Destroy several humans within 3 seconds with the globe.
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- High Roller ( 20 points )
| - Complete all story missions in Las Paradiso.
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- Horticulturist ( 20 points )
| - Feed 100 humans to the Venus Human Trap.
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- Massive Damage ( 20 points )
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- Monkish Bowling ( 10 points )
| - Shen Long - Use the bowling ball to bowl over at least 3 monks with a single throw.
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- Paradiso Pursuer ( 20 points )
| - Find all the Furon Crash Test Dummies in Las Paradiso.
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- Pox's Apprentice ( 20 points )
| - Complete half of the Odd Jobs in the game.
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| - Las Paradiso - Shoot a Propane tank cluster to blow up a building.
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- Proctologist ( 20 points )
| - Probe 100 humans with the Anal Probe.
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| - Destroy 25 Red Nexosporidium Warriors on the 4th Ring of Furon.
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- Sacred Son of Arkvoodle ( 30 points )
| - Activate all of the landing zones in every invasion site.
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- Shen Long Scout ( 20 points )
| - Find all of Pox's Record Collection in Shen Long.
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- Shock Trooper ( 20 points )
| - Shock 100 humans with the Zap-O-Matic.
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- Sleeps with the Fishes ( 20 points )
| - Destroy 15 Mobsters in Las Paradiso.
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- Sunnywood Seeker ( 20 points )
| - Find all the Furon Emperor Statues in Sunnywood.
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| - Sunnywood - Destroy "SUNNY" on the Sunnywood sign.
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- The Emperor's Agent ( 40 points )
| - Complete all odd jobs in the game.
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- The Francodyne Connection ( 25 points )
| - Destroy 15 Francodyne Guards.
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| - Destroy 15 Lunarian Thugs in Sunnywood.
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| - Complete all story missions in Shen Long.
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