| Achievement | How to unlock
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| - Disable 10 religious items.
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| - You need to figure this one out yourself.
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| - Kill 3 people with firehydrant.
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| - Break 5 different items with mindcontrol.
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- Developers deserve to die!
| - Kill passangers from the bus.
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| - Kill 3 persons with a scythe.
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| - Kill a person with electricity.
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| - Decapitate an enemy 6 times.
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| - Use a woodchipper to make minced meat.
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- Hospitals are for pussies
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- I just called, to say, I will kill you
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- I remember when I lost my mind
| - Use chainsaw to kill an enemy.
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- I want to ride my tricycle!
| - Find a tricycle and ride it.
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| - Make someone else shoot you with a nailgun.
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- Is Ted really your friend?
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| - Kill a person with a blunt object.
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| - Poison A heart transplant in two ways.
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| - Use chainsaw to kill an enemy in the final episode.
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- Ludlow is too small for me
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| - Use 5 different items with mindcontrol.
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| - Kill a person with a nailgun.
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| - Kill 3 people with the pressure chamber.
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| - Kill everyone in every level.
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| - Attack and kill 5 persons with mindcontrol.
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| - Use 4 vending machines to acquire goods.
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| - Witness a person getting ran over by a car.
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| - Kick dead enemy head around.
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| - Disable a religious item.
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- She's just looking for attention
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| - Hit a person with sledgehammer.
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| - Kill 3 people by using the environment while they are having a smoke.
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| - Kill a person by getting them to drop down to the elevator shaft.
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| - Split a persons head with a circular saw.
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| - Use bees to kill an enemy.
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| - Kill more than three persons in a row.
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| - Attract enemy attention 5 times with smokes.
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- These are the toys of my life
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| - Disable 5 religious items.
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- Trumpets filled with water
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| - Create a homemade bomb from fertilizer.
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| - Kill a person with Poison.
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