| Achievement | How to unlock | Points
|
|---|
| All Kleer | Kill fifty healthy Kleers with a direct double shotgun hit. | 20
|
| All Roads Lead To Rome | Head into Rome. Ditch Rodriguez. | 10
|
| Are You Not Entertained? | Party like it's 199. | 10
|
| Atomic Wedgie | Use the mininuke to eliminate hundred enemies at once. | 50
|
| Brass Lantern | Finish a text adventure. On an oil rig. During an alien invasion. | 15
|
| Bullseye | One-shot kill three Werebulls with a shotgun. | 20
|
| Class Reunion | Navigate the citadel of Carcassonne. Start reassembling your team. | 10
|
| Classic Hero Stuff | Save a princess. Doesn't get more classic than that. | 15
|
| Cultist Stimulator | Recover a key stolen by a cultist. | 15
|
| Dismemberfest | Dismember fifty enemies with cannonballs. | 20
|
| Ecclesiastical Extraction | Save the rookie. Find Father Mikhail. See the sights. | 10
|
| Enemy of My Enemy | Make twenty enemies kill each other using Psychotropic Grenades. | 20
|
| For the Cause | Find out what happened to Alessandro. | 15
|
| From Earth With Love | Send Mental a message he won't forget. | 10
|
| Fulbert le Fou | Discover Fulbert's great invention. | 15
|
| Get Serious | Unlock 10 S.A.M.s in a single playthrough. | 20
|
| Hard Science Fiction | Get a weaponized black hole, using science. | 15
|
| Harvest Festival | Harvest hundred enemies with a combine harvester. | 20
|
| Harvest Noon | Don't fear the reaper. Be the reaper. | 10
|
| Heads Up! | Kill hundred enemies with a headshot. | 20
|
| Holy Driver | Ride the Popemobile to victory. | 10
|
| Hot Hot Hot | Run away from an angry volcano you foolishly antagonized. | 10
|
| La Nonna e Mobile | Meet a powerful granny. | 10
|
| Max Pain | Kill five enemies during a single Time Warp slowdown. | 20
|
| Megabarf | Kill a Belcher using Belcher collateral barf damage. | 20
|
| Mushroom Surprise | Find out what happened to the English airman. | 15
|
| No Surrender | Kill five enemies in a row while your health is below 10 HP. | 20
|
| Oh, Shut Up | Destroy ten propaganda drones. | 20
|
| Oil's Well That Ends Well | Escape the Oil Rig. | 10
|
| Pow Pow! | Kill an Aludran Reptiloid using nothing but a pistol. | 20
|
| Quadruple the Gun | Kill twenty enemies while dual wielding double shotguns. | 20
|
| Quality Time | Go on a date with Hellfire. | 15
|
| Regression | Get knocked on the head and remember how you got here. | 5
|
| Roman Holiday | Get together with your friends and kill something big. | 10
|
| Say Hello To My Mini Friend | Spend thousand minigun rounds while firing continuously. | 50
|
| See Carcassonne And Die | Cross the French countryside and get very cross. | 10
|
| Serious Art | Protect humanity's treasures from invaders with no taste. | 15
|
| Serious Sam | Beat the game on any difficulty. | 100
|
| Signature Move | Sign Secchi's rifle. | 15
|
| Southern Gentleman | Assist a couple of young ladies out hunting. | 15
|
| Spinal Tap | Kill eleven different enemies using melee attacks. | 20
|
| Spread the Joy | Kill three enemies with a double shotgun blast. | 20
|
| Tear 'n' Rip | Melee a big enemy. | 50
|
| That Belongs In A Museum | Recover the alien artifact located by Dr. Stein. | 15
|
| That Burning Sensation | Collect scorched aliens for Professor Kiesel. | 15
|
| The French Achievement | Achievement is your middle name. | 15
|
| The Informant? | What if you could talk to the monsters? | 10
|
| The Last Human | Get justice. Get the Holy Grail. Get screwed over. | 10
|
| The Spirit of Roma | Fight alongside Massimo Murena. | 15
|
| This Seems Safe | Unlock a S.A.M. | 20
|
| Veni Vidi Witchy | Kill a Witchbride using C4. | 20
|
| Volcano Antagonizer | Die HAARP With A Vengeance. | 10
|
| Where's That Girl | Make sure Gabriella is OK. | 15
|
| You Have Been Wormed | Assist Dr. Vermetti in his war on worms. | 15
|