| Achievement | How to unlock
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| A Fistful of Zorks (10 points) | Finish Veraville.
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| Been There, Died Like That (50 points) | Meet your end in six different ways.
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| Beswitched (25 points) | Complete Earth 2.0 Level 10 while swapping no more than 11 times.
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| Bloated (10 points) | Shift for the first time.
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| Both in the Same Float (25 points) | Keep both characters suspended in air at the same time for 4 seconds.
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| Crafty Velocity (15 points) | Finish Sherbert in under 34 minutes.
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| Defied by Gravity (50 points) | Complete Earth 2.0 Level 10 while jumping no more than 5 times.
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| Hoarding the Cola (50 points) | Collect 30 bottles of Black Hola Cola in a single world.
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| Holy Moly! (100 points) | Earn all Achievements.
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| I'll Be Your Friend Til the End (10 points) | Complete a level with a random multiplayer partner.
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| Last Zork Standing (75 points) | Defeat the giant robot boss at the end of each world without dying.
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| Malcolm at the Front (15 points) | Finish Veraville in under 26 minutes.
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| Met at the Candy Shop (10 points) | Finish Hyperactivia.
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| Mooned in Time (15 points) | Finish Earth 2.0 in under 31 minutes.
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| Newbie Hoarder (10 points) | Collect all bottles of Black Hola Cola in a single level.
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| No Guts, No Glory (50 points) | Jump on Hammerbot's head and live to tell the tale.
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| No Sucking Involved (10 points) | Finish Event Horizon.
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| No Time to Zork Around (75 points) | Complete all levels in Time Attack mode.
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| One Small Step for a Zork (10 points) | Finish Earth 2.0.
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| Panic Box! (75 points) | Get stuck at the objective in Level 9 on Hyperactivia.
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| Speedy Bonzo (15 points) | Finish Hyperactivia in under 24 minutes.
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| Sucky Speed (15 points) | Finish Event Horizon in under 16 minutes.
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| Sugar Rush (75 points) | Collect all 150 bottles of Black Hola Cola.
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| Switched at Birth (75 points) | Complete Event Horizon Level 3 while swapping no more than 11 times.
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| Up to You (25 points) | Complete Event Horizon Level 3 while jumping no more than 14 times.
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| Wanna Play With Me? (10 points) | Invite a friend to a multiplayer match.
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| Way of the Tentacle (10 points) | Finish Sherbert.
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| Zomegacorp Employee of the Month (75 points) | Complete the game.
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