| Achievement | How to unlock
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| An Ensemble Cast (10 points) | There may be no I in "team," but there is in "variety."
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| Getting A Head In the Game (15 points) | Sometimes you just need to relax and take the weight off your shoulders.
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| Good Hunting, Commander (15 points) | A good commander knows how to wield her forces effectively.
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| Instant Hair Dash (15 points) | Let your parasite feel the wind between his tendrils.
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| Medical Board Will Be Notified (15 points) | Your opponents aren’t the only ones under the knife.
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| My Pain Will Be Visited Upon You (15 points) | Sometimes you can take it, and sometimes you just want to lash out.
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| Prolix (20 points) | Words are fun - expand your vocabulary.
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| Real Circus Damage (15 points) | And now, for the main attraction... Grappling!
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| Sküllgirls (20 points) | Graduation day has arrived at last! Mrs. Victoria’s so proud of you.
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| The Kitchen Sink (15 points) | Throw everything at them, including...
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| Threads of Fate (30 points) | Follow all threads of fate to their inevitable conclusions.
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| Toil and Trouble (15 points) | A sesquidecemvir of seven simulacra synergizing simultaneously.
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