| Trophy | How to unlock
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| ...Take on the Words! (Bronze) | Sit through the end credits.
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| Alas, Our Lazy Speechwriters Didn't Cover This (Bronze) | Talk to Washington, Jefferson, or Hancock while they're outside.
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| And Then the Universe Explodes (Bronze) | Try to mix the decaf and caffeinated coffees.
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| And Then the Universe Implodes (Bronze) | Try to mix the disappearing ink with Booboo-B-Gone.
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| Are You My Mummy? (Bronze) | Talk to Dead Cousin Ted with all three kids.
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| Behind Every Great Man Is a Quality Roadie (Bronze) | Red makes a super battery with only a little help from Hoagie.
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| Can't Win and Chew Gum at the Same Time (Bronze) | Laverne tries the chattering teeth on her human during the human show.
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| Chateau Eau Neaux (Bronze) | Make vinegar.
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| Chef (Bronze) | Cook the hamster in Maniac Mansion (Don't try this at home, kids!).
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| Coffee Achiever (Bronze) | Wake up Dr. Fred.
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| Costume Quest (Bronze) | Clothe Laverne in the costume.
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| Dialog Puzzles Are Hard (Bronze) | Get Fred to sign the contract.
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| Don't Try This at Home (Bronze) | Microwave the frozen hamster.
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| Dude, It's Like, Cannibalism (Bronze) | Hoagie eats a Hoagie.
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| ESRB Violation (Bronze) | Laverne thinks about eating the cat.
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| Energy Conscious (Bronze) | Turn off the television.
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| Games History Major (Bronze) | Play Maniac Mansion.
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| I'm Sure He'd Never Notice (Bronze) | Try to swap the textbook with the stamp album.
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| It's an Honor Just to Compete (Bronze) | Enter the human contest.
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| It's an Honor Just to Compete But Winning Is Better (Bronze) | Win the human contest.
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| Master Plumber (Bronze) | Flush 50 objects through time.
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| Missing Pink (Bronze) | Try to mix the red paint and the Booboo-B-Gone.
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| Moronic Drone (Bronze) | Get a job.
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| Most Annoying Guest Ever (Bronze) | Ring the front desk bell 100 times.
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| Music Appreciation Award (Bronze) | Reach yesterday without turning the stereo off.
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| Not Raised in a Barn (Bronze) | Close a door.
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| Novelty Enthusiast (Bronze) | Get all six novelty items.
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| Now You're Pushing It (Bronze) | Try to microwave the hamster again after he's thawed out.
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| Obvious, Really... (Bronze) | Make it rain.
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| Of Course It Would Still Weigh the Same (Bronze) | Get a tiny sweater.
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| Oh Right, I'm Playing a Cartoon! (Bronze) | Make a skunk.
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| Olive Branch (Bronze) | Return the stamp album to Weird Ed.
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| Only George Can Destroy a Tree (Bronze) | Destroy a cherry tree.
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| Only Hoagie Can Make a Tree (Bronze) | Create a cherry tree.
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| Rap Sheet: Adventure Gamer (Bronze) | Pick up 45 things that don't belong to you.
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| Rap Sheet: Cheat (Bronze) | Disqualify Harold.
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| Rap Sheet: Forger (Bronze) | Try to sign the contract yourself with the quill pen.
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| Rap Sheet: Fraud (Bronze) | Try to alter the contract with Booboo-B-Gone.
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| Rap Sheet: Kleptomaniac (Bronze) | Pick up 30 things that don't belong to you.
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| Rap Sheet: Thief (Bronze) | Pick up 15 things that don't belong to you.
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| Rap Sheet: Trespasser (Bronze) | Find Fred's basement workshop.
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| Rap Sheet: Vandal (Bronze) | Deflate Oozo.
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| Rap Sheet: Yegg (Bronze) | Open the safe.
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| That Joke Never Gets Old (Bronze) | Squirt five different people with disappearing ink.
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| That Only Works with Alligators (Bronze) | Try to flush the hamster.
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| That Should Have Worked (Bronze) | Hoagie uses battery with Chron-o-John instead of plug.
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| Voiding the Warranty (Bronze) | Try to put something metal in the microwave.
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| WWSCD? (Bronze) | Climb through the chimney with all three kids.
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| We're All Brothers (Bronze) | Ask the IRS agents if they're related.
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| Windsock it to Me (Bronze) | Change the flag.
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| You Call That a Hint? (Bronze) | Try to wash the dirty car with the brush.
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| You Suck (Bronze) | Vacuum up a hamster.
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