| Achievement | How to unlock
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| 1,000,000 BC Completed! | Complete the Prehistoric time zone.
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| 198X Completed! | Complete the 198X time zone.
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| 3 Birds 1 Stone | Kill 3 enemies with a single charged shot from Aimy McKillin.
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| 9600 BC Completed! | Complete the Ancient Atlantis time zone.
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| All of the Glorbs | Collect all glorbs in the game.
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| Asplosion | Use Jef's highly explosive rocket launcher to explode 15 enemies on a single level.
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| Baby's First Glorb | Get your first Glorb Badge.
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| Decked Out | Complete all HellaDeck Levels.
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| Defence is the New Offence | Beat any level using only Shieldy Blockerson.
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| Gotta Save Them All! | Complete any level without leaving any saveable team members behind.
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| Head Banger | Kill any enemy by bouncing on its head, plumber-style.
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| Hella Fun | Complete 5 HellaDeck levels.
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| I Challenge You to a Duel | Complete a Medieval level using only Lou Don Jim.
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| Impartiality | Complete any level using at least 6 different members of the Super Time Force.
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| Infinity | Defeat Dr. Infinity.
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| Number One Shard | Get your first Shard badge.
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| OMG You Sharded! | Shatter or collect all shards in the game.
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| Range of Fire | Fire 7 different charged attacks in a single level.
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| Saxamaphone | Use Saxton Hale to punch 100 enemies right in their stupid faces.
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| Something Smells Rank | Achieve your first STF rank on any level.
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| Speed Freak | Complete any level with 30 seconds remaining on the clock.
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| Talent Scout | Add a new team member to the Super Time Force.
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| Team Player | Prevent the deaths of 50 members of the Super Time Force.
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| That Was Quick | Die within 3 seconds of spawning.
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| THE HARDEST OF CORE | Complete Super Hardcore Mode.
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| The Pyro Show | Burn up a whole level and complete it using only Pyro.
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| The Runs | Complete a... clean... run of any level using only Squirty Harry.
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| They Are Looking | This ones totally a secret but you'll know it when you see it so hustle and look sharp.
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| Tossy Tossy Boom Boom | Toss and shoot 100 of Zoey's propane tanks to asplode them!
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| Whole Lotta Lead | Fire 5000 rounds with Jean Rambois' machine gun.
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| Year 199X Completed! | Complete the Post-Apocalypse time zone.
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| Year 3072 Completed! | Complete the Future City time zone.
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| Year 673 Completed! | Complete the Medieval time zone.
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