| Achievement | How to unlock
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| A Match Made in Heaven! #1 | Play Free for All on Duel with Splorch.
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| A Match Made in Heaven! #2 | Play Free for all Sumo Steam Guns on Space.
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| All skill! | Play 2 player Free for All on Pagoda without powerups.
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| Better pay attention | Get a warning on the level select screen.
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| BLAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRPPPPPP | Experience Super Splorch.
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| BOOT SQUID! | BOOT SQUID!
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| Bought the game! | THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!!!
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| Found it. | Feel the effects of the Super Power Up.
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| He really is super. | Get the Wings and at least 1 speed up powerup while wearing the Super Costume.
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| How it's meant to be played! | Play over 100 rounds without exiting the level.
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| It actually happens pretty often. | Have one player win Free for All without punching.
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| IT'S PRETTY MUCH LIKE NORMAL. | Find Sumo Platforming.
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| Ma' own place! | Make a level in the level editor!
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| Man, that thing's cute | Find the secret Lizard (and extra credit if you can figure out what it does!)
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| MENS VS MACHINES | Play with 4 humans players and 4 AI players.
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| Now you're doin' it right! | Delete a level in the level editor.
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| Played against the machine | Play a round with some AI players!
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| So coordinated! #1 | Have at least four human players jump within 1/6 of a second of each other.
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| So coordinated! #2 | Have at least 4 human players punch within 1/6 of a second of each other.
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| Test Achievement! | This is the achievement that I put in for testing, and I left it in so you could get it too!
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| This should be the default | Have all signed-in characters be squids.
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| Told you they were fast | Finish a round in under 5 seconds.
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| Ultimate PARRRRRRTY! | Play with 8 human players.
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| Unlock Mexico | Now you've got them all!
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| Winding up! | Have one player jump 3 times, then land a hit. Punching will reset the jump counter!
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| You have patience! | Wait on the level select screen long enough to see a tip.
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