| Achievement | How to unlock
|
|---|
| A Trip to The Coast | Escape successfully in arcade level 1.
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| An Honest Days Work | Went trainspotting.
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| Bad Day at The Office | Got fired.
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| Bad Deal | Could have gone better.
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| Bad Dreams | Designer drugs are never a good idea.
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| Bad Omens | You got a fortune cookie. It could have been better.
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| Biker Bar Beatdown | You showed them the dangers of being in a 50's timewarp.
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| Briefcase Collection | Started your career in architecture.
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| C.R.E.A.M | Holla holla get dolla.
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| Clean Kill | At least there was a bath to wash the blood off.
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| Cultured | You visited a museum.
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| Feel the Payne | Killed the "Bad" cop.
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| Found Your Keys | Got a new ride.
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| Get Strapped | Buy a gun.
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| Go Clubbing, Get Legless | Gave it another go, still don't like clubbing.
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| Hazardous Workplace | You should have been wearing a hazmat suit.
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| High Rise | Saw the impact of social division, still stole from them. You monster.
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| I Need Insurance | Finish a level with 1 health remaining.
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| Infiltration | Didn't get caught.
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| Nightclub Nightmare | You never liked clubbing anyway.
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| Nightmare Scenario | Uh Oh.
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| Small Town Criminal | Finish all objectives in arcade level 1.
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| The Sound of The Police | Have someone call the police on you.
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| Triad and Failed | Far eastern crime syndicates are on the decline.
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| True American | Buy every gun.
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| Visiting Rich People | Paid a visit to a nice house.
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| What Have You Done? | Finish apocalypse mode level 1.
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| Who Needs Insurance? | Finish a level with more health than you started with.
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| Workplace Macro-aggressions | You never needed that job anyway.
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