| Achievement | How to unlock
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| Balls Deep | Get 10 chicks to have multiple orgasms.
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| Bang for the Buck | Acquire fully upgraded Blast Gernades.
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| Blood for the Blood Goddess | Get with 1000 Blood Elves.
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| Blown Circuit | Get with SexBot 10 times.
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| Bone Banned | Got knocked out of macking 100 times.
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| Bone Me a River | Get with 100 Blood Elves.
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| Booty Hunter | Collect all the Alien Artifacts.
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| Chuggin' Like An Orc | Ingest 1000 bottles of Jet Fuel.
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| Clear Cut King | Get with 1000 Hard Wood Elves.
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| Cock Blocked | Got knocked out of macking 10 times.
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| Curtain Call | Complete Chapter 5: Who's the Boss on Hard
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| Exterminatus Extraordinar | Complete Chapter 3 without losing an alter on Hard.
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| Fire Breather | Acquire fully upgraded Jet Fuel.
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| Fleshpot Fillet | Complete Chapter 10: The Orgy, on Hard.
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| Full-Fledged Space Wrangler | Play the game for 1000 Hours.
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| Getting Your Red Wings | Get with 10 Blood Elves.
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| Givin' It All She's Got | Ingest 100 bottles of Jet Fuel.
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| Golden Curtain Call | Beat Chapter 5 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Fleshpot Fillet | Beat Chapter 10 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Hole Glory | Beat Chapter 7 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Interstellar Extinction Policy | Beat Chapter 3 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Keep you Bots in Line | Beat Chapter 2 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Lord of the Dicks | Beat Chapter 11 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Master Blaster | Beat Chapter 9 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Orc Master | Beat Chapter 1 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Ram it Everywhere You Can | Beat Chapter 4 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Sweet Sixteen | Beat Chapter 6 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Golden Two in the Pink | Beat Chapter 8 without losing a Wrangler on Normal or Hard.
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| Got Wood? | Get with 10 Hard Wood Elves.
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| Great Balls on Fire | Acquire a fully upgraded Flamethrower.
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| Hate Crime | Knockout 1000 Elves.
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| Headmaster Level | Beat the game without dying in a mission.
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| Hero of the Alamo | Get knocked out 1000 times.
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| Honcho Hacker | Knockout 10 Orcs.
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| Hung like a Howitzer | Acquire a fully upgraded Cannon.
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| Interstellar Extinction Policy | Complete Chapter 3: Manifest Destiny, on Hard.
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| It's Mine! | Complete Chapter 7 without letting a Wrangler have sex on Hard
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| Keep it in Your Pants | Complete Chapter 9 without letting a Wrangler have sex on Hard.
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| Keep your Bots in Line | Complete Chapter 2: Secure your Ho's, on Hard.
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| Lord of the Dicks | Complete Chapter 11: Dicks Cometh, on Hard.
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| Lubbock Licking Award | Get with 100 chicks.
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| Lubbock Lover | Complete Chapter 8 Stage 3 without letting Lubbock die on Hard
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| Mags in the Bag | Acquire fully upgraded Ammo.
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| Master Blaster | Complete Chapter 9: The Headmaster, on Hard.
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| Mean Lean and Dripping Green | Get with 1000 Orcs.
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| Meathead Masher | Knockout 100 Orcs.
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| Mook Mangler | Knockout 1000 Orcs.
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| Once you go Green | Get with 100 Orcs.
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| Orc Master | Complete Chapter 1: Enter the Orcs, on Hard.
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| Peak at the Pink | Get with 10 Pink Elves.
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| Pink Fever | Get with 1000 Pink Elves.
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| Platinum Curtain Call | Beat Chapter 5 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Fleshpot Fillet | Beat Chapter 10 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Hole Glory | Beat Chapter 7 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Interstellar Extinction Policy | Beat Chapter 3 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Keep your Bots in Line | Beat Chapter 2 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Lord of the Dicks | Beat Chapter 11 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Master Blaster | Beat Chapter 9 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Orc Master | Beat Chapter 1 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Ram it Everywhere You Can | Beat Chapter 4 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Sweet Sixteen | Beat Chapter 6 without dying on Hard.
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| Platinum Two in the Pink | Beat Chapter 8 without dying on Hard.
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| Pretty in Pink | Get with 100 Pink Elves.
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| Pussycat Wrangler | Complete Chapter 4 without letting any girls escape on Hard.
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| Ram it Everywhere You Can | Complete Chapter 4: Bone and Pillage, on Hard.
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| Riding like a Wrangler | Get with 10 chicks.
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| Rocky Ground | Get with 10 chicks and don't make them orgasm.
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| Rode Hard and Put Away Wet | Snort Ammo 100 times.
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| Ron Jeremy in Space | Get with 1000 chicks.
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| Snorter-in-Chief | Snort Ammo 10 times.
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| Stackin' Lumber, Oh Yea! | Get with 100 Hard Wood Elves.
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| Stainless Steal | Complete Chapter 2 without letting SexBot get Boned on Hard.
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| Stomping Daiseys | Knockout 100 Elves.
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| Sweet Sixteen | Complete Chapter 6: Race to the B's, on Hard.
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| Tantric Solider | Get 1000 chicks to have multiple orgasms.
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| Terminator Nostril | Snort Ammo 1000 times.
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| The All Nighter | Get with 100 All Night Elves.
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| The Fire Below | Acquire fully upgraded Fire Gernades.
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| The Flesh is Weak | Get with SexBot 1000 times.
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| The Good, The Bad and The Horny | Play the game for 100 Hours.
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| The Grass is always Greener | Get with 10 Orcs.
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| The Hole Glory | Complete Chapter 7: The Glory Days, on Hard.
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| The Metro Mangler | Knockout 10 Elves.
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| There are Many Others like it | Acquire a fully upgraded Rifle.
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| Toaster Banger | Get with SexBot 100 times.
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| Twink Love | Complete Chapter 6, killing Twink 4 times, on Hard.
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| Two in the Pink | Complete Chapter 8: Moon Jewels, on Hard.
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| Two Pump Chump | Get with 100 chicks and don't make them orgasm.
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| Wail to the Chief | Get 100 chicks to have multiple orgasms.
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| Wet 'er Whistle | Get knocked out 10 times.
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| Where's my Backup | Got knocked out of macking 1000 times.
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| With a Pocket Full of Shells | Acquire a fully upgraded Shotgun.
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| Working on a Night Train | Get with 1000 All Night Elf Chicks.
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| Wrangler Bait | Play the game for 10 Hours.
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| Wrangler Whooping | Get knocked out 100 times.
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| You Blue It | Get with 10 All Night Elves.
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| You Selfish Bastard | Get with 1000 chicks and don't make them orgasm.
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| You'll Go Blind | Ingest 10 bottles of Jet Fuel.
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