| Achievement | How to unlock | Points
|
|---|
| A Breath of Fresh Air | Make your way out of the offices. | 10
|
| A Dog's Best Friend | Gordon helped the dogs. | 25
|
| A Powerful Point | Find some Punctuations. | 10
|
| A Purging Tide | Gordon helped Ray. | 25
|
| A Star of Light | Gordon helped Gobblette. | 25
|
| A Student | Finish the game with an A rank or higher. | 25
|
| Basic Training | Finish the game on Normal difficulty or harder. | 5
|
| Canceled Yet Again | Gordon rejected Ricky's offer. | 10
|
| Cheater's Reward | Play with all cheats active. | 10
|
| Commando | Finish the game on Unfriendly difficulty. | 50
|
| Final Mystery | Later is now. | 25
|
| First Mission | Finish the game on Survival difficulty or harder. | 10
|
| Honor Roll | Finish the game with an S rank. | 50
|
| Hospitality | Find Ricky's snackeroos. | 10
|
| It Doesn't Work | Waste twenty rounds on Pearl. | 50
|
| Learn Your ABCs | Find the Stenographer. | 10
|
| Looking in the Mirror | Gordon helped Pearl. | 25
|
| Loquacious | Find the Novelist. | 10
|
| Mercy | Escape the Unfriendly Neighborhood without defeating the boss. | 25
|
| Morning | A new day dawns. | 10
|
| Music for Four Hands | Gordon helped Arnold. | 25
|
| Neighborhorde Family | Unlocked all Neighborhorde characters. | 25
|
| Neighborhorde Veteran | Unlocked all Neighborhorde stages. | 25
|
| One More Season | Gordon helped the show come back. | 10
|
| Passing Grade | Finish the game with a B rank or higher. | 10
|
| Pure Rhetorical Power | Find the Conclusion. | 10
|
| Reckless | Finish the game without saving. | 25
|
| Resurrection | Defeat the boss and escape the Unfriendly Neighborhood. | 25
|
| Scratched | Find a cheat tape. | 5
|
| Simplicity | Finish the game with only the Stenographer. | 25
|
| Simply Stupendous! | Finish the game on Unfriendly with an S rank. | 50
|
| Slightly Staggering! | Finish the game on Survival or harder with an S rank. | 25
|
| Somewhat Impressive! | Finish the game on Normal or harder with an S rank. | 25
|
| Soundly Shocking! | Finish the game on Veteran or harder with an S rank. | 50
|
| Streamlined | Finish the game without opening the tool chest. | 25
|
| Sugar Rush | Reach a max speed of 50MPH. | 50
|
| Survivor | Finish the game without healing. | 25
|
| Tapeless | Finish the game without using any duct tape. | 25
|
| The Trusty Wrench | Find the pipe wrench. | 10
|
| Treasure Hunt | Gain access to Stage 5. | 50
|
| Unfinished Work | Gordon left work early. | 10
|
| War Hero | Finish the game on Veteran difficulty or harder. | 25
|
| Worn Out | Find five cheat tapes. | 25
|