| Achievement | How to unlock
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| Ballistic Weaponry | Collect the different Ballistic Weapons toys in your Janitor's Trunk.
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| Bloody Incompetent | Prove your incompetence by leaving a worse mess and clock off.
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| Christmas Crisis Corrected | Completely clean Santa's Workshop without breaking any Christmas items and clock off.
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| Cleanliness is Godliness | Completely clean all mess in Santa's Workshop and clock off.
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| Head Hunter | Collect elf heads in your Janitor's Trunk, you freakin' psycho.
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| Rooks Kept | Collect the different Rooks Keep figurines in your Janitor's Trunk.
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| Sanitized Earth | Completely clean all mess and destroy every Christmas item in Santa's Workshop and clock off.
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| Santa Hats Must Die! | Incinerate 50 Santa hats, the symbol of everything you hate.
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| St. Nick's Boomstick | Collect Santa's shotgun in your Janitor's Trunk.
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| The day the Funk Died | Bring about the sad meeting of Funk Ninja to fire.
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| The Nose Knows | Collect the iconic reindeer nose in your Janitor's Trunk.
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| Thunder Candle | Requisition a new replacement janitor through the use of TNT.
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| Tower of Babel | Build a stack of 10 stools.
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